It had to start, you know it did...
Bought a dog from the local blacksmith. As soon as I got him home he made a bolt for the door.
________________
My granddad fought in WW1 and survived mustard gas and pepper spray.
He was classed as a seasoned veteran.
_________________
3 Yorkshire lads and 3 Cockney blokes were in a ticket queue at York Central train station heading to Euston for a Scotland - England International at Wembley.
The 3 Cockneys each bought a ticket and watched as the 3 Yorkies bought just one ticket between them.
"How are the 3 of you going to travel on 1 ticket?" asked one of the Cockneys.
"Thall av t watch and learn" answered one of the boys from the North.
When the 6 travellers boarded the train, the 3 Londoners sat down, but the 3 Northerners crammed into a toilet together and closed the door.
Shortly after the train set off the conductor came around to collect tickets. He knocked on the toilet door and said, "tickets please." The door opened just a crack and a single arm emerged with a ticket in hand. The Conductor took it and moved on into the next car.
The Southerners saw this happen and agreed it was quite a clever idea. Indeed, so clever that they decided to do the same thing on the return trip and save themselves some money.
That evening after the game, when they all got to Euston, the Cockney blokes bought a single ticket for the return trip, while to their astonishment, the 3 Yorkshire lads didn't even buy 1 ticket.
"How are you going to travel without a ticket?" asked one of the perplexed Cockneys.
"A tell thee, Lad, tha has t watch and learn", answered one of the Tykes.
When they boarded the train the 3 Cockneys crammed themselves into a toilet and the 3 Yorkies crammed themselves into another toilet.
Shortly after the train began to move, one of the Tykes left their toilet and walked over to the Cockney's toilet. He knocked on the door and said "ticket please".
_______________
If you lose one sense, your other senses are enhanced.
That's why people with no sense of humour have an increased sense of self-importance!!
_______________
My wife has Informed me she is leaving me for my best mate.
To be fair, he was just a mate until she told me.
__________
My daughter wanted a Cinderella themed party.
So I invited a couple of her friends round, and made them clean the house.
Bought a dog from the local blacksmith. As soon as I got him home he made a bolt for the door.
________________
My granddad fought in WW1 and survived mustard gas and pepper spray.
He was classed as a seasoned veteran.
_________________
3 Yorkshire lads and 3 Cockney blokes were in a ticket queue at York Central train station heading to Euston for a Scotland - England International at Wembley.
The 3 Cockneys each bought a ticket and watched as the 3 Yorkies bought just one ticket between them.
"How are the 3 of you going to travel on 1 ticket?" asked one of the Cockneys.
"Thall av t watch and learn" answered one of the boys from the North.
When the 6 travellers boarded the train, the 3 Londoners sat down, but the 3 Northerners crammed into a toilet together and closed the door.
Shortly after the train set off the conductor came around to collect tickets. He knocked on the toilet door and said, "tickets please." The door opened just a crack and a single arm emerged with a ticket in hand. The Conductor took it and moved on into the next car.
The Southerners saw this happen and agreed it was quite a clever idea. Indeed, so clever that they decided to do the same thing on the return trip and save themselves some money.
That evening after the game, when they all got to Euston, the Cockney blokes bought a single ticket for the return trip, while to their astonishment, the 3 Yorkshire lads didn't even buy 1 ticket.
"How are you going to travel without a ticket?" asked one of the perplexed Cockneys.
"A tell thee, Lad, tha has t watch and learn", answered one of the Tykes.
When they boarded the train the 3 Cockneys crammed themselves into a toilet and the 3 Yorkies crammed themselves into another toilet.
Shortly after the train began to move, one of the Tykes left their toilet and walked over to the Cockney's toilet. He knocked on the door and said "ticket please".
_______________
If you lose one sense, your other senses are enhanced.
That's why people with no sense of humour have an increased sense of self-importance!!
_______________
My wife has Informed me she is leaving me for my best mate.
To be fair, he was just a mate until she told me.
__________
My daughter wanted a Cinderella themed party.
So I invited a couple of her friends round, and made them clean the house.